In a recent episode of MBN‘s Miss Back, former Nine Muses member, Sera broke down while trying to talk about the family and the pain she still feels because of it.

sera2

In contrast to the other members, Sera confessed that she can’t sympathize with the happiness and joy that they associated it with.

sera4

When asked to draw her family, Sera drew various circles and squares, which the consultant interpreted as her difficulty to draw them as their true forms due to the painful memories she has of them.

sera3

But she did draw one happy memory that she has of her family, which was when her father lifted her up from the hot sandbox, making her feel warm and loved.

sera6

Regarding memories of her family, Sera expressed that she just wants to rip everything up in shreds at the thought of them.

Regarding my family… I just want to rip it to shreds.

— Sera

When Sera was a trainee, her parents got a divorce, and her family now live apart from one another.

sera5

Despite the pain that accumulated over the years, Sera still hopes that her family can be healed.

Regarding my family, I hope there can be something I can expect and hope from them in the future.

— Sera

Aside from healing on her own, that’s something she plans to work on from this point forward.

seera9

Check out the full clip below: